Posts tagged Quotes.
If they ask you about me, tell them “She was the only girl who loved me with honesty, and I broke her.”.
I think it’s absolutely crazy how feelings can flicker so quickly, deteriorate so easily. One minute my ears are filled with the sound of your soothing voice complementing my every thought, mistake and action- then the next you plaster me with doubt, mentally suffocating me with criticism. I don’t know which is the truth and which is the lie, or what hurts more; the compliments or the suffocation. Weird isn’t it. I am not sad because your feelings changed, or that you lack understanding. No. I am sad that you are letting go of someone who was willing to change themselves into a better person. Change for you. All the care and feeling I have towards you is being thrown away. You let go of that, you let go of me. And you will never find that again. Another girl? Sure, but not the feelings I had. No matter how hard you search. Never. Giving you a chance and showing the slightest bit of affection was an ocean of effort. Appreciate me. Patience is all we needed, all you needed. But waiting seemed like a forever maze; an inescapable facade, an emotional trap. I can’t keep living in the past, the only time that’s real is now, the only time that exists is now. Our touch, our laughter, forever hugs, feelings, kisses and every depressing word I just wrote no longer exists. It’s in the past. Dead.
I’m not the girl your mother warns you about.
I won’t kiss your best friend or break your heart.
I won’t make you choose between what you love to do & me.
I’m not cold. I’m not reckless.
I’m the girl your father mentions when your mom’s not around.
I’m the girl that gets away.
I will love you more than anything.
I will kiss you when you cry.
I will stand by your side until you decide otherwise.
And you’re just like your father, so you will.
You’ll let me go & I won’t look back,
But you will.
I promise you, you will.
I’m that girl.
I broke my rules for you, isn’t that enough?
Everything seems to be exhausting me, no matter how much sleep or how much coffee I drink or how long I lie down, something inside me seems to have given up. My soul is tired.
If you find a girl that is willing to go through hell just to keep the relationship going, you really shouldn’t take her love for granted.
Going through hell for someone and in return being taken for granted was the most painful thing I’ve ever experienced. Never. Again.
He liked her with long hair so she cut it short.
I do not want to be a person. I want to be unbearable.
1. When I was little, my mother told me that my ribs are there to protect my heart. It turns out you can break ribs pretty easily. They shatter the second you press too hard or meet a boy with pretty eyes who leaves your skin burning and kisses your neck. My heart is not in very good condition.
2. My freshman year of high school I read this book over and over again. I remember one line talked about how love can save you. The author forgot to mention that it can also tear you apart and fuck you up beyond repair.
3. I broke my fingers trying to pick the lock to your heart.
4. Apparently vodka isn’t the solution to everything because after the fifth shot, the only word I managed to slur was your name.
5. You know those dumb depression commercials where they show some women and there’s a black cloud following her around and it gets bigger and bigger and swallows her whole until she finally takes some fucking medication? You’re my cloud. You’re hanging over my head and swallowing me whole but pills won’t make you go away, trust me, I’ve tried.
6. It turns out words can physically hurt. They can leave you clutching at your chest and shaking. They can leave you empty. They can twist around your body and cut off your blood circulation. I learned that when you told me you didn’t love me anymore.
7. I’m not yours anymore but god I wish I was.
8. Things fall apart. Things get messy. Most of the time you can put them back together but sometimes pieces get lost and you sit there puncturing your chest with little bits of yourself but nothing fits right and suddenly there’s blood everywhere.
9. Nervous breakdowns aren’t cute.
10. Boys don’t kiss you because they love you. They kiss you because they want to taste you. I hope I’m still on the tip of your tongue. I’d do anything to get you off of mine.
11. Heartbreak is not beautiful. It’s not tasting him in your cigarettes or empty beds in lovely little hotels. It’s not rainy afternoons where the air wraps around you the way he did or cups of coffee the color of his eyes. It’s just a lot of shaking and crying and hyperventilating and blood.
12. When the fuck does it stop hurting?
Maybe the wolf is in love with the moon, and each month it cries for a love it will never touch.
I hope you look for me in everyone you meet.
I was 19 when I finally stopped opening the door for unrequited love.
I was 20 when I first learned that
courage tasted like bitter wine and metal. Like blood and honey.
When I told you I loved you,
I screamed it. I let it rip
it’s way out of my throat, and
it felt so good that I cried.
The other day, you walked by me
with your friends and I could feel the pity in your stare.
Don’t you do that.
Don’t you look at what I had for you and call it weak.
Not when you were the one
afraid of it.
I stood there with my hands open,
my mouth bruised tender with supplication.
Don’t you dare treat me like a victim
of my own emotions, like being
moved to my knees by love
was a mistake that I regret.
I will go to my grave with the memory
of the bravery in my bones.
I am not ashamed of any of it.
Not the closed door in my face
or the static silence of my phone
for weeks after.
I was not afraid.
I am still not afraid.
I will never be afraid again.
Bring in the beasts with teeth
like tree branches.
Bring in all the men who will never love me.
Bring in the monsters with
faces carved out of stone.
I am not afraid.
They can eat me alive.
I am not afraid.
I will cut my way out of their bellies.
I am not afraid.
Hi. I miss you, a little. No, actually I kind of miss you more than I intended to. I keep thinking that maybe, just maybe you are missing me too. I don’t know what’s going on between us and I don’t know what you are thinking. I wish I did. It would make things a little easier for me. I would know whether to stay or to leave. Because I know it’s my place to go but I still hope you’ll ask me to stay. I’m not sure if this is considered a fall out but this silence is killing me. And what’s worse is not knowing why we stopped speaking in the first place.
Remember when I told you I wasn’t very good with words, especially in real life? Like I didn’t know how to express myself to you because it was just all kinds of nerve wrecking to me. So I thought if I write a letter, it’d be better because at least then, I can get some things off my chest regardless if you read it or not. A part of me hopes you’ll read this, a part of me hopes you won’t.
I’ve been spending all of last week wondering what made you stop talking to me. Like, was it something I said or something I did? Or was it just because you are no longer interested? I know feelings change, I get it; but don’t you think it’s only fair that you’d let me know you didn’t want to see me anymore? I’ve been lying in bed every night, wondering what the hell changed and I can’t seem to figure it out. I have come up with so many theories and excuses but I just can’t find the one that seems to justify my quench of curiosity.
I cried one night, or two but I don’t want to tell you the details in this letter. Because I’m not sure you deserve to know.
It literally kills me that I feel this way because I never meant to like you this much in the first place, and I never thought that you would just cut me off either. I don’t know what hurts more, not knowing or you leaving. I am just confused as to, why all of a sudden? I keep asking myself the same questions, over and over again and all I can do is replay scenarios in my head and trying to pick up if something had gone wrong. Maybe this is all in my head, but you cannot deny that something has definitely changed in the atmosphere.
You say you’re busy with school and work, and I get it. I really do. But how can someone be that busy to not even try? I’ve had my fair share of hearing excuses and I know one when I hear one. Being busy is what people tell other people when they are over them, when they no longer want to see them. So I get it. I know what you are trying to say. yet, there’s a teeny tiny part of me that hopes I’m wrong. Maybe I’m wrong and you really don’t mean it that way. Maybe I am overreacting. Maybe I am just going insane. Just maybe, I am wrong.
But today I saw you. And I’m pretty sure you saw me too. And I was hoping maybe you’d stop me and say “Hi, I’ve missed you” or even, “Hello, how are you?” but you didn’t. You never even said “hey.” We just walked past each other. That really hurt. I literally felt the atoms in my body close up and my heart, physically ached. My best friend asked if you texted me after and I told her I didn’t check my phone but probably not. I didn’t check my phone because I didn’t want to know. I was trying to give you some time to make a decision. I was hoping that maybe, just maybe you would have texted because you still cared. But you didn’t, and that hurt even more. Are we not going to even say hello anymore? That’s almost like murder.
I told my friends that I was out of tears. I lied.
I’ve been thinking about this so much and there is so much on my mind that I don’t even remember all that I want to say anymore. There is so much I want to say in this letter, but I can’t write it all. And this letter has become so disorganized, but that’s okay because that’s how my mind is right now. It’s a jumble of thoughts. A web of questions. I have become so distracted and vulnerable, I can’t even focus on my homework. I would lay down in bed at 12 am and not fall asleep till 3 or 4 in the morning. You asked me if I stayed up so late thinking about you, I lied and said no but the honest answer is oh God, yes. I cannot sleep because the questions haunt me. My eyelids feel heavy and I am physically tired but my brain just won’t stop going. It just keeps running and I am so sick and restless.
Explanation. Closure. Will you ever give me one? If you don’t like me anymore, just tell me. If you have found someone else, just tell me. If you think I’m not good enough, just tell me. But you can’t hold my hands and kiss me and tell me you like me and then leave me there hanging onto nothing. You left me in the state of limbo, but I cannot figure out everything by myself. Were we nothing? I mean, if we were nothing then just tell me. I can take the truth. I hate not knowing. But don’t fool me into thinking that we had something going on, just to cut me off. I told you about my past, but you made sure to repeat it. And that is not fair.
I opened up to you. How can you make me open up to you and then leave? I think back on all the things that you said. So were any of it true, or were they just lies? Sweet talking, that was your best trait and I hated it at first but it grew on me but now, I am upset at myself for believing you. I think back on all the compliments you gave, apparently they weren’t real. I just don’t get why you had to choose me of all people. There are so many other girls out there, if you wanted to play games you could have picked someone else. I didn’t ask for this. I didn’t agree to participate. I did not sign up to get injured. But that’s how it always is right?
I am mad. And I am sad. And then I am furious. And then I am hurt.
I’ve been hurting a lot recently, not that you care but I thought I’d let you know.
You really, really, hurt me.